Letter to My Dream [v0.2.1] [MrConcreteCup]

General suggestions:

First, you shouldn’t need a cheat to make this a harem. It really should just be Harem; or focus on a path that leads to one girl for multiple playthroughs with each girl for differing results.

I will say unless you intend to add the angry raven haired semi goth girl into the list of LI’s I don’t know why she’s in game currently. You get one actual interaction in which she’s a bitch to MC for no real reason. That’s not attractive.

There’s also the fact that Sophie for some reason is FemDom fantasy, but the other two are shaded Male Dom (I would argue Izzy goes a bit too far. The wording is derogatory for no real reason – he does not need to be aggressive to prove Dominance. It’s not about Ire. It’s about control. Willingness to surrender. If I have to “make” you submit to me, I’m doing something wrong… This also applies to choking. Which can be dangerous on it’s own. Go look up David Carradine and how he died, is all I’m saying)

The sandbox is a bit of a PITA format when the arrows are NOT permanently present. If you want me to search for new things on the screen, highlight what can be clicked. It’s far easier that way, and less likely a player will fuck something up that they might want to find.

Esme and Issabella I would take straight off the list. I get the hot for teacher fantasy – believe me, I had that when I was a teen myself, but it’s too much trouble in a game that’s going for Semi-realism if you think about how likely it would screw more than just the MC’s life up WHEN they get caught. Esme’s little shocker at the end of current update says you’re well aware of this. Drama is one thing, forced failstates that don’t have to be, I would caution against. (Hell introduce the Dean as Angry Raven Girl’s hot mom… have MC begin to fuck the dean to compound on Angry Girl’s Mommy/Rebel issues, and that could solve both problems) Just something to watch out for in the narrative.

Box head doesn’t have to be an incel shaded asshole to everyone. Frankly the wage gap has been disproven. The fact you write that sentence either means you’re aware of the point, and the credible reasons that one does exist which can be explained easily, or you’re actively making fun of it. Which is misandric. Hatred goes BOTH ways. The chinese asshole who fucks up your sleep for a meal, I am concerned you’ve coded Gay or Bi. Please don’t. Just don’t. He can be that if you insist, but do not force that content by having recommended paths accept his quests, and then funnel the player into stuff they don’t want to see. That’s assholish.

Beyond that, there’s some potential, but Jesus one last point being what the hell is it with Devs making a near shrimp-like MC face off against a literal gorilla? Let me be at least buff enough that it looks like I might be able to handle myself in a fight before you try to make the MC a white knight. He’s not fire proof, and doesn’t need to slay the dragon. Give me brass knuckles or a chain wrap and it might be more even odds (and yes, that would get MC expelled and charged. I know, but the point stands – there is a REASON for weight divisions in any martial sport. You do not put a pipe cleaner against a brick wall and expect the pipecleaner will come out on top. Ever) The only reason he “won” the fight was because it didn’t start, and that’s just a little too much Word of God. Is Mommy gonna get him out of every situation? Think about these things before you code them into games. Because in real life, he’d be shoved into a locker at best, or in the hospital. If not the morgue.

Also would be nice if you’d give the player the choice of where they want to finish during the one non-fantasized sex scene. (Which would at least give Esme a good reason to be shocked, and MC perhaps more of one, since she could be just beginning to show by that point…)