Tomboy: Love in Hot Forge [Final] [Zylyx]

For me there are a few points: She FemDoms WAY too often for a female in a masculine profession – who frankly should know it’s better to be SUBMISSIVE in order to attract a mate she wants (there’s one scene where you STATE that MC has the chance to dominate her; and he pussy’s out of anything that actually WOULD be. Because he’s afraid she will be mad. If you want to ACTUALLY show progression of the relationship = She WON’T be. Rather than skipping weeks at a time)

* The nobleman goes nowhere. There’s NO point to him in the game except the intro. Even that’s a ham-fisted way to get her to accept help that she DOES actually need and anyone that was actually a smith would tell you more help, and trained help especially is always welcomed for larger orders. Implying that he wants her personally (so he can fuck her/own her) was not necessary.

The Dildo was HIGHLY unnecessary. If she said it’s for a friend; add the fucking friend. You stole the option to take her virginity for what fucking reason? You think someone that work focused would more often than not give a fuck about sex??? And if she was the stoic you wrote her to try and be, masturbation, not PENETRATION would be the best she’d allow herself. That’s besides the fact the first actual sex scene is a RAPE of the male MC. Then her apology is STILL her bossing him around… so not an apology. You wrote this guy to be dense as fuck as well as actually desperate. So it comes off FAR more predatory than I think you meant it. [Pacing, would help. Showing at all besides one dumb assed masturbation scene that steals a potential tag from the game for no reason, wasn’t the way to show she was catching “feelings” for MC] * Which I would debate because again = Rape Scene. Do you not think about how any of this looks when you guys code it? Come on.

The fact you end the game right as it should be progressing (and deny pregnancy content or more actual MALE dominance in the progression of a marriage – which she could easily view as different to her former mindset because now he is her HUSBAND and she WANTS to KEEP him. Not just assume she has no work to do in order to make him stay. This wasn’t modern times guys. She DOES NOT have that guaranteed. It should be the second stage of the game, where you can maybe start to actually GIVE the Player choices. Go down different paths, maybe introduce other women. That the smith will eventually open up in mindset, to let MC have… as well as her to keep. Or raise a family of like 7 kids together, and teach them all to be blacksmiths. There was a LOT more you could have done with this, and most of what you did was actually incredibly offensive. Because there is NO choice for him to refuse, or gain any actual control of the situation. She’s a tomboy; so what? That doesn’t mean she doesn’t know how to be feminine, or wouldn’t want to be. For that special someone. That’s where you all that pull this crap go so very wrong with this concept. Females are generally NOT sexually dominant. If they are, they have to be DAMNED sure their partner is willing to submit for the long haul, and you really did fuck all of actual BDSM content. So you’re implying she’s something that she’s not, because you don’t know how to write her as something she SHOULD be. In order to properly balance it out. Not to mention make it enjoyable to a wider audience.

Since it says final I know it doesn’t matter. You consider it done. So this is here to warn players; if you like any choice at all, genuinely value a tomboy who can soften… or care about men’s rights, or even hell just want a decent story that goes on for more than half an hour where the creampies have any sort of consequence = this is NOT that game. At all.